If there’s two things we love here, it’s eating and banging. The only thing possibly better than eating and banging would be eating AND banging? Seriously, how come nobody ever just goes to town, eating a ham sandwich or something? That would be HOT.
Eating is such a sexual experience, and musicians know this. That’s why food has been such a long-standing analogy for sex. In honor of eating and doing it, we’re asking you to put some sugar on our tongue. Are these songs really about just food? You decide!
10. Beck – “Peaches and Cream”
Peaches and cream you make a garbage man scream
Besides being vaguely about food, and entirely about doing it, this is just a really awesome song.
9. Howlin’ Wolf – “Back Door Man”
When you come home you can eat pork and beans.
I eats mo’ chicken any man seen
Back Door Man is full of all kinds of double entendre. What’s knocking on your back door? Howlin’ Wolf’s pork and beans, that’s what.
8. The Strangeloves – “I Want Candy”
Candy’s just what the doctor ordered
She’s so sweet, she makes my mouth water
Yeah, it’s a given. Any song about any kind of candy is really about doin’ it!
7. Van Halen – “Ice Cream Man”
I’m your ice cream man baby, stop me when I’m passin’ by
See now all my flavors are guaranteed to satisfy hold on, one more
Diamond Dave’s got a bomb pop to put in your mouth!
6. Cibo Matto – “Artichoke”
I keep asking for you more and more
Can you peel my petals one by one?
All of Cibo Matto’s songs were about food (and probably also about sex). Artichoke might be the most blatant. Are artichokes really even sexy?
5. Talking Heads – “Sugar on My Tongue”
She gonna put that sugar on my tongue
She’s gonna gonna gimme gimme gimme some
Maybe Dave was singing about someone making him a margarita in a sugar-rimmed glass? Nope. Sugar is always sex.
4. Def Leppard – “Pour Some Sugar on Me”
Pour some sugar on me
Ooh, in the name of love
Anyone who’s ever poured the sexy time chocolate sauce or whipped cream over themselves knows full well that this is only sexy for about three minutes, before it turns into a horrible sticky idea.
3. 50 Cent – “Candy Shop”
I’ll take you to the candy shop
I’ll let you lick the lollipop
Translation: Come here, girl, would you like a piece of candy?
2. Warrant – “Cherry Pie”
Tastes so good
Make a grown man cry
Sweet Cherry Pie
Can anyone just eat a piece of cherry pie ever again and not think of sex? If you can, you’re living wrong, man.
1. The Rolling Stones – “Brown Sugar”
Ah brown sugar how come you taste so good
The Stones wrote the title and the chorus, and pretty much gave up pretending it was about food after that.
I said yeah, I said yeah, I said yeah, I said
Oh just like, just like a black girl should.
Succinct, and to the point! Just like a sex song should.
Feeling hungry? Check out these awesome oldies about food (which are probably also about sex). You like Peaches? Well, these Juicy Booty songs are a Peach.
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