It’s one of the most exciting moments in music. Few things say “rock and roll” quite like smashing a guitar at the end of a show. Always at the end of a show. You can’t do it at the beginning, even if you want, because the show’s over. Even if you have another guitar, it’s just going to be downhill from there. Everyone’s going to expect you to smash another one at the end, and smashing two guitars in one show? That’s just silly.
So, we’ve collected some of the greatest guitar deaths of all time. The famous, the infamous, the funny, and the irrelevant. It’s the 11 Greatest Guitar Smashers of All Time.
11. Stone Cold Steve Austin
Pro wrestling is the straight man’s soap opera. It has just as many shirtless men, and even worse scripting. An acoustic guitar smashed over anyone’s head is always good for some laughs, though.
10. Ritchie Blackmore
If you weren’t smashing your guitar in the 70s, you weren’t anybody. Ritchie Blackmore isn’t so much smashing his guitar as he is slowly kicking its ass, and toying with it, before finally putting it out of its misery.
9. Kyle Busch
You just won a big race, and for your trophy, here’s a guitar. What are you going to do, now? Smash it. Well, try to smash it, at least. Don’t quit your day job, Kyle.
8. Slash
Why’s this look so weird? It’s because Slash is all wired up to capture his guitar smashing for Guitar Hero 3. The day people stop smashing real guitars, and it’s all CGI is the day Rock and Roll is officially dead.
7. “Priceless” Kid
This commercial was apparently banned, for no other reason than the Mastercard people are total idiots, it seems. This is a brilliant commercial.
6. Kurt Cobain
You’d think Kurt would have been a more mellow guy, always getting to take his frustration out on his equipment. No amount of guitar smashing would make up for being married to Courtney Love, though.
5. Paul Stanley
Paul wins the guitar smashing longevity award. When the day comes that you can’t lift the guitar over your head to smash it, because of the arthritis, it’s time to give up the makeup.
4. John Belushi
How many times have you been at a party, and some nozzle is strumming his acoustic guitar, and you wanted to smash it over his head? Try every time.
3. Jeff Beck
Jeff Beck made it safe for other people to smash their guitars. Before Jeff, everyone thought only Pete Townshend was allowed to smash his. Jeff was the guitar smashing Moses, leading everyone else to the promised land.
2. Pete Townshend
We’re pretty sure someone was smashing guitars before Pete, but Pete gets all the credit. We’re also pretty sure that Pete’s hearing loss has a lot to do with all of those exploding guitars and drum kits, so we’ll let him have this.
1. Jimi Hendrix
Learn from the master, Pete. You know what’s better than smashing a guitar? Setting it on fire, first! Even if Jimi’s music had sucked, he’d have been legendary, just for this.
Looking to smash some more stuff? Check out the 20 Women Who Rocked Our Asses, and the Craziest Songs by Women Who Were Cheated On. Dinosaur, Jr., on the other hand, appears to be rocking too loud on their new album.
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