Call him the King of Pop. Call him “Wacko Jacko“. Whatever you do, though, just don’t call him on his day off.
Michael Jackson thought he was signing up for 10 shows in London, but his bookers booked him for 50 shows. We’re a bit surprised that MJ could fill up 10 shows these days, let alone 50, but that’s beside the point.
Michael’s as broke as Latoya these days, and we’re pretty surprised that he’d be turning down work, with little chilluns to feed, but it’s true.
“I don’t know how I’m going to do 50 shows,” Jackson said, “I’m not a big eater–I need to put some weight on.”
Damned straight you do, and you could start by getting your original nose back. That should add about two pounds, alone. Since Michael doesn’t want to sing, we’ve come up with some alternate jobs for Michael, that might be more befitting a man of his interests.
Catch our career counseling after the jump.
Potential Michael Jackson career changes:
Office Manager:
Frugal bosses know that office supply costs will drop by as much as 99%, when employees are required to get their Post-Its off of Michael’s face. We don’t even want to know where he’s keeping the rubber bands.
A career in fighting crime as super hero Vitiligo Man!
We know if we were stealing plasma TVs from Target, and that walked in, we’d run for our lives.
Michael Jackson Impersonator:
These days, being a Michael Jackson impersonator is far more lucrative than, you know, being Michael Jackson.
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